Absolution Solution™ + Holy Water Kit
Absolution Solution™ Sticker Removal Solution
With heavenly guidance, this product will safely remove those unsightly “Trump/Pence” bumper stickers from one’s car. Ingredients are eco-friendly and gentle on any surface. And, the kit comes with a laminated holy card for gentle nudging of Trump remnants. Bottles, while plastic, are reusable and resurrectable.
Upon removal of the Trump bumper sticker, this product will help avoid self-flagellation and will absolve the offender of his/her sin against neighbor and country — therefore, making it possible for the offender to navigate freely within the community, while also escaping eternal damnation!
Sacred and revered Holy Water is for extra powerful cleansing of any lasting effects of “The Donald’s” residue, such as sticky golden shower adhesive. This product comes purified from the Vatican and doubly blessed in our factory’s sacristy. Aids in restoring sacred American democracy. Okay, these statements might be loaded with alternative facts.
Absolution Solution Kit Price: $25.00*
We appreciate your purchase and helping your friend reach absolution, however, we are only able to dispense one kit at a time. We are currently unable to perform the miracle of multiplying the loaves and fishes with our kits. But, check with us later and ask the Paypal angels to guide us.
*Blessed are the meek and generous for 15% of your purchase will be donated to the ACLU, Planned Parenthood (in Mike Pence’s name), or Common Cause.
The erasure of ignorance is bliss!